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snoggedTitle: Do Bad Things To You
Author: snogged
Disclaimer: Carter Bays, Craig Thomas, and various other corporations own How I Met Your Mother. I don’t. Please don’t sue.
Pairing: Barney/Lily
Word Count: 200
Rating/Warnings: FRM/R; PWP
Setting: Season 6 – “Desperation Day”
Summary: Barney's thought process during Lily's Marshall fantasy.
Beta:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
idioticonion. All other mistakes are mine.
A/N: Blame Jace Everett. He was the first artist that came up on my iPod this morning. :P
Bends me over the island…code for: harder, Marshall, harder….
Lily doesn’t need Desperation Day or Valentine’s Day to demonstrate how she’s a ten with the self-confidence of a twelve and the sexual depravity of two. She doesn’t need a special day to make his skin hot, make his dick twitch, make him forget that Marshall is his bro.
He’d bend her over the bar counter in a heartbeat if that would make her shut up, even spank her with - he thinks for a second, trying to recall what Carl has hiding back there – a wet dish towel seems too Phy. Ed, but it would work. He’s always had a skill for making just about any household item kinky. He’d paint her backside with broad red stripes, make her moan and buck against him as he….
Fuck!
He needs to stop thinking about this. No matter how horny Lily is, he knows she’d rather dry hump a pillow into oblivion on the eve of Valentine’s Day, instead of giving him a try. Plus, Marshall would kill him for going there.
Lucky for him, the path to salvation is not paved in cotton. It’s paved in bimbos.
All hail Saint Desperatius.
Author: snogged
Disclaimer: Carter Bays, Craig Thomas, and various other corporations own How I Met Your Mother. I don’t. Please don’t sue.
Pairing: Barney/Lily
Word Count: 200
Rating/Warnings: FRM/R; PWP
Setting: Season 6 – “Desperation Day”
Summary: Barney's thought process during Lily's Marshall fantasy.
Beta:
idioticonion. All other mistakes are mine.A/N: Blame Jace Everett. He was the first artist that came up on my iPod this morning. :P
Bends me over the island…code for: harder, Marshall, harder….
Lily doesn’t need Desperation Day or Valentine’s Day to demonstrate how she’s a ten with the self-confidence of a twelve and the sexual depravity of two. She doesn’t need a special day to make his skin hot, make his dick twitch, make him forget that Marshall is his bro.
He’d bend her over the bar counter in a heartbeat if that would make her shut up, even spank her with - he thinks for a second, trying to recall what Carl has hiding back there – a wet dish towel seems too Phy. Ed, but it would work. He’s always had a skill for making just about any household item kinky. He’d paint her backside with broad red stripes, make her moan and buck against him as he….
Fuck!
He needs to stop thinking about this. No matter how horny Lily is, he knows she’d rather dry hump a pillow into oblivion on the eve of Valentine’s Day, instead of giving him a try. Plus, Marshall would kill him for going there.
Lucky for him, the path to salvation is not paved in cotton. It’s paved in bimbos.
All hail Saint Desperatius.
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no subject
on 2011-02-15 04:33 pm (UTC)That's my Naked Barney and Lily Laugh.
Yummers! :-D
no subject
on 2011-02-15 04:35 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2011-02-15 04:40 pm (UTC)And yet... when I think of Marshall... oh so naughty and wrong... in all the good ways...
no subject
on 2011-02-15 04:42 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2011-02-15 05:40 pm (UTC)Loved it!
no subject
on 2011-02-15 07:30 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2011-02-16 08:23 pm (UTC)*needs a cold shower now*
no subject
on 2011-02-16 08:27 pm (UTC)I do not write the greatest last lines. I think I'm rubbish at them. But thank you anyway!!
no subject
on 2013-07-20 09:50 pm (UTC)You just let me know :)
no subject
on 2013-07-22 12:27 am (UTC)As for more, I have a Barney/Lily tag in my sidebar of the stories I've written.
There's also some great links at the end of